For most people, dating can be a nerve-wracking experience. You meet a guy, you like him, you exchange numbers, you get to texting…and suddenly, you find yourself desperately interpreting every single thing he does or doesn’t say.
The more you like him, the worse it is. You don’t want to risk boring or scaring him off.
The absolute worst is when he just doesn’t answer you at all, because you find yourself wondering what you did wrong. To help save you some frustration and heartache, we’ll help you figure out what to text a guy to get him respond here.
What Makes Him Ignore or Answer Your Text?
We’ll start by looking at what makes a guy answer or ignore you. A basic understanding of what to do and what not to do will help you decide on your own texting strategy.
At its very, very basic core, there’s a simple reason why men choose to answer: they answer things that make them feel good, and when they have time to reply.
So if he’s ignoring you, there could be a few different reasons. The easiest and best one is that he’s simply too busy to answer you right now, and is planning to do so once he can.
Other reasons aren’t as much of a relief. It’s possible he doesn’t know how to keep the conversation going, he’s not really that invested in you, you’ve scared him off a little, or he thought your last text didn’t need a response.
Carrying out a conversation which will have him hanging on your every word is difficult by text. It takes some finesse and understanding of what men crave.
Luckily, there are some helpful resources you can dig into for advice on how to absolutely tantalize any man with text messages. Our favorite resource is this Text Chemistry course, because it was written by a romance expert named Amy North. It’s filled with text templates that are easy to use and guaranteed to pique your man’s interest.
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What to Text a Guy to Get Him to Respond
Make sure you’re not at his beck and call.
As you text your guy, there’s one thing you should keep in mind above all others: don’t let him think you need him. If you’re coming across as desperate to him, he’ll know he can have you whenever he wants you.
When we can easily get something at any time, it loses its intrigue. The truly interesting things are the things that we need to work to get, the rare things.
It may not feel so great when you’re doing it, especially if you’re dying to talk to him, but you’ll need to make yourself into a rarity. When he texts you, don’t immediately jump on your phone and answer him. Take your sweet time replying.
The only time you should rush to reply is if he’s just asked you a time-sensitive question. It would obviously be rude to leave him hanging if he’s trying to confirm dinner plans with you, for example.
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Send him a joke or a meme.
Remember, guys like to talk to people who make them feel good, and nothing feels quite as good as a deep belly laugh. If you have the means to make him laugh out loud or even just smirk at his phone, you’ll definitely earn some brownie points with him.
For that reason, you can try keeping a stock of memes on your phone that reference his interests. Or, if you hear a joke you have a feeling he’ll like, share it with him.
We let our guard down around people that make us laugh. Get him grinning, and he’ll associate talking to you with fun, and he’ll desire more of you.
Also See: What to Text Your Ex-Boyfriend After a Breakup (To Open Him Up Again)
Keep the conversation centered on him, and ask him questions about himself.
We’ve said it before, and we’ll say it again now: most people’s favorite thing to talk about is themselves. This isn’t necessarily because everyone is self-absorbed; it’s just easiest to talk about things you know well. And what could you possibly know better than yourself?
You can take advantage of this (and get some intel on him!) by asking him questions about himself. Questions are great for breathing life into or starting a new conversation completely. It gives him a conversational thread to hold onto, and shows him you’re interested in learning about him.
Just try to avoid asking him too many questions. If you’re sending him strings of questions in a row, he’ll feel like you’re interrogating him.
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Ask him questions in general.
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Your questions don’t have to be about only him. Questions overall are a fantastic way to get someone responding to you, so there’s no reason you couldn’t talk about other things.
Ask him for his opinion on something, whether it’s a tv show you both watch or what movie you should watch next. Get his thoughts on particular bars or restaurants in the area.
If you’re trying to go for interesting, steer clear of the standard “how are you” type of questions. This small talk is fine for starting a conversation when you’re not sure what else to say, but you shouldn’t use them if you’re in the middle of a conversation.
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Snap a sexy selfie for him.
It’s no secret that many men are sexually motivated. Even when they legitimately want a committed relationship with you, they love being teased, to say the least.
You can use this to your advantage. If you’re feeling more comfortable with him, take time out of your day to randomly send him a sexy picture.
It doesn’t have to be a full-on nude; in fact, it’s often better to avoid doing so, especially if you suspect he’s going to be a short fling. But there are many pictures you can take fully clothed that just scream sexy, such as you in your most showy outfit or even a swimsuit.
Heck, you can convey sexiness with nothing more than your face. You know that smoldering look models do while they bite their lip? Something like that could get your guy’s mind and heart racing if you can pull it off.
Make plans to see him again.
One type of conversation that requires participation from all parties is making plans. You can’t really make them without input from the other people, and planning a date with your guy is the same.
Provided it’s been a little while since you last saw him, and you’re pretty confident he wants to see you again, why not start planning your next meeting?
Make sure you don’t jump on this conversation immediately after seeing him, though. You risk seeming too eager if you spring this talk on him literally hours after hanging out.
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Learn How to Make Him Answer Whenever You Want Him To
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Texting is just exhausting sometimes. Like we said at the beginning of this post, it’s easy to fall into this endless cycle of constantly interpreting everything he says or second-guessing yourself.
Did you just seem desperate when you asked him what he’s up to? Do you sound boring when you ask him how he’s doing? Is he ignoring you, or is he just busy?
So many questions! The good news is, you’re not alone. With resources like the Text Chemistry course as your disposal, you’ll have something to fall back on whenever you feel overwhelmed. The text templates in the program are simple, and you can use them whenever you’re at your wit’s end and you want him to answer you.
My name is Jenny and I love helping people with their relationships. I believe a few simple tips can help people massively improve their communication skills with their partners and really express themselves. Thanks for visiting!