What To Do When He Doesn’t Text You Back: 15 Responses

When a guy doesn’t message you back when you expect him to, or as fast as you’d like, it can be frustrating (to say the least).

So, how do you remedy the situation without making him feel bad or causing him to lose interest?

Read on below and learn all about what to do when he doesn’t text you back!

Here’s What To Do When He Doesn’t Text You Back

There are numerous reasons guys don’t answer back right away sometimes: they are busy, their hands are full, something major is happening, they are upset, depressed, or in a bad mood.

All of which is out of your hands. What is in your hands, however, is the choice to respond in a way that makes an accurate statement about how you feel.

If you’re looking for the best wast to react when he doesn’t answer you back, consider the following 20 responses:

1. Consider His Perspective

Girl texting

The first and most mature thing to do when a guy isn’t texting you back is to stop and consider his perspective.

Does he have a real reason to answer you? And, if not, why should he?

Are you dating? Or is he just a friend?

Have you maybe done something to offend him, or missed some grand gesture he intended to impress you with?

Everything must be taken into consideration before you decide how to proceed.

2. Don’t Make It a Big Deal

the next step in properly handling it when a guy doesn’t text back is not making it a big deal automatically.

Girls. Listen to me: it’s not always a strawberry blonde cocktail waitress named Star that’s keeping your man from texting back… sometimes it’s just that he’s busy working, studying, or playing Call of Duty with his side chick.

Don’t automatically assume the worst and you are already handling things like a real boss.

3. Avoid Assuming Anything

Girl texting

Speaking of not assuming the worst, it’s best to not assume anything actually.

Wait until he messages you back and lets you know what’s been going on.

If you still have questions once he replies to you, go ahead and submit your queries!

4. Take His Emotional State Into Account

Whether he finally texts back, or you’re still waiting for his reply, consider his emotional state before you put him on blast.

He could be feeling fragile and unimportant because of something you’ve said, or some crazy thing he thinks. He could even feel guilty about something he’s done.

5. Take Your Emotional State Into Account

Girl texting

For obvious reasons, you must also consider your own emotional state before firing off any additional texts when a guy is ignoring you or hasn’t answered back yet.

Ignoring your own emotional state causes you to cook up all sorts of crazy ideas like his no-response is him trying to end things, or that he’s off having a threesome with two beautiful women.

6. Send a Follow-Up Text

If you really want to talk to him, following up with another text is an option. That said, it’s a risky one.

Most of the time it’s better to leave things be until he’s ready to answer… anything else is liable to drive him off or result in him no longer being interested in you romantically.

But, if you’re the daring type, take a chance at reinitiating an entirely new conversation by broadsiding him with some lighthearted and meaningless topic.

7. Reassure Him You’re Interested

Girl texting

Reassuring him that you’re interested in a long-term relationship, with him, or whatever it is that you’ve been waiting on him to answer you back about.

The point here is to reassure him of your interest in him, and that he is in control of things.

If you can manage to do that, you may get that finally get that text back that you’ve been dying for.

8. Try Not To Send Mixed Signals

When a guy doesn’t text back, he may not necessarily be sending mixed signals or playing hot and cold.

He may just be busy with work, family, or life obligations.

That’s why you should do your best to restrain from playing games with him when you think he’s putting you off.

9. Hire a Relationship Expert

Girl texting

It surely wouldn’t be our first suggestion or our last, but here it is: if you’re really struggling with the fact that he isn’t texting you back, consider hiring a relationship expert to walk you through it.

Sure, they are over-priced and highly likely to be over-rated altogether, but, at least they’ll always text you back!

10. Ask Him If He Wants To Spend Time Together

Sometimes the reason the guy isn’t texting you back is that he misses you too much. As backward as it may sound, it’s sometimes true.

Maybe you’re spending too much time at work, or with friends and family, and not enough with him (in his mind, mind you).

If you suspect this may be his mindset, give him a call or message him and ask him to come to spend some time together. If it was his problem, he’s likely to jump on the opportunity and text you back rather quickly.

11. Give Him Radio Silence

Girl texting

Giving a guy a good old-fashioned slice of silent-treatment pie in return for him not returning your texts is a classic go-to move for many girls.

The main issue with this approach is that he may not respond for an even longer period of time, in response to your radio silence.

12. Do Absolutely Nothing

Another great response right out of “when a guy doesn’t respond to my text message playbook” is doing absolutely nothing.

The difference between doing nothing and giving him radio silence is that doing nothing means not reacting.

Doing nothing means you go about your daily routine as if nothing is wrong (and he doesn’t exist).

13. Play Games With Your Friends

Girl texting

Speaking of playbooks, if you want to give ’em a taste of their own medicine, try inviting your best friends over for an overnight Call of Duty marathon.

While you’re gaming, make sure to leave your phone’s ringer onto silence mode so his insistent texting doesn’t throw your vibe off.

14. Evaluate Your Texting Habits

If he’s not answering your text back is bothering you on a deep and serious level… your best option may be to take a big step back and evaluate your texting habits.

Why does his not texting back bother you so much? Do you feel that you need him to text you back in order to be complete and whole? If so, it’s time to toss the phone and start communicating with sticks, stones, and smoke signals.

15. Stop Thinking About Whether He’ll Text or Not

Girl texting

Sometimes the best response is simply to STOP thinking about whether he’ll take you back or not.

The truth of the matter is that he’ll decide when to return your message.

You pestering him about it may only end up in him losing interest in you.

16. Accept the Fact That He Is Super Busy

Guys have lives that don’t always revolve around us (it’s hard, we know!).

That means sometimes when he doesn’t answer… it’s because he is super busy with something other than you (again, we know, honey, but, you’ll survive!).

If you enjoy him taking you out on dates, and making it rain on you, then you need to let the man get his hustle on.

17. Try To Focus On Yourself

Girl texting

Whatever response methods you choose, avoid losing sight of the bigger picture.

Stay focused on yourself, and avoid letting rumors you heard, negative thoughts or some silly unanswered text disrupt your peace, goals, and/or ambitions.

Pointers for Responding When He Doesn’t Text You Back

When you’re expecting a text from someone, and it takes them a bit longer than usual, or they don’t end up texting you back at all… it’s confusing and doesn’t feel good by any stretch of the imagination.

A few great pointers to recap from the sections above and keep in mind before responding when he doesn’t text back include:

  • Restrain from lashing out at him, he may not be at fault
  • Consider all party’s perspectives, and give people a break sometimes
  • Avoid automatically feeling hurt when he doesn’t answer on your timeframe
  • Admit that if you aren’t dating, you may not be the only girl in his life
  • Don’t assume there is some terrible reason he hasn’t texted you back yet


Why Do Guys Not Text You Back?

There are endless reasons why a guy may decide not to text you back immediately, or not to text you back at all: he may feel nervous around you, intimidated by you, guilty for something he’s done, harsh about something you’ve done, depressed, confused, or a million other emotions.

Should I Text Him Back After He Ignored Me For Days?

When a guy is ignoring you, or you think he is, you may feel the urge to text him and text him until either the cows come home, the fat lady sings, or he picks up his damn phone and sends you a reply. The feeling is normal, but, it’s the last thing you should do. If something is bothering him, each message you send may crank his pressure meter up a notch higher.

Should I Text Again If No Reply?

How long you’ve been waiting, what the context of the previous messages was, and most importantly, the nature and status of your relationship with said guy, are a few of the most significant factors to consider when making the decision of whether or not to try texting him again when he’s not answering you.

How Long To Wait If He Doesn’t Text You Back?

There is no golden rule for how long to wait when a guy doesn’t text you back all of a sudden. You have to take the whole picture into account, including what your daily life/schedule looks like, as well as what his daily obligations and routines are, not to mention your relationship status. Sometimes an hour or two may be a long wait, other times it may be days or even weeks.

What Do You Do When a Guy Won’t Text You Back?

When a guy doesn’t text you back, the first thing you should do is take a step back and relax. Look at the whole picture before you even think about reacting. Something could have come up, his phone could have fallen into the water when he was saving baby ducks from drowning, and he could have even been abducted by aliens and abused with probes.

Jenny Muscolo
Jenny Muscolo

My name is Jenny and I love helping people with their relationships. I got my Masters in human sexuality at Northwestern University, and love what I do.

I believe a few simple tips can help you massively improve your communication skills with your partners, which leads to better interactions. Thanks for visiting!