What to Text a Guy After Being Ghosted (Do’s and Don’ts of Texting Post-Ghost)

You feel a mixture of emotions once you’re hurt. Sadness, anger, anxiety, low self-esteem…all of these things combine to make you a volatile emotional mess.

To make yourself feel better, you might get tempted to get even by venting at him. Here’s our advice: don’t.

Swearing at him, even in just one or two words, will make you look immature. You’ll come off as the lower person, and you’ll probably regret it later.

Take the high road here, and don’t waste your time. The brief satisfaction you’d feel is not worth it.

Send him a novel or rant at him.

If you’ve decided to go with one our recommendations and let him know how you’re feeling, keep it short. Resist the temptation to send him a long message describing your every feeling and how he wounded you, even if it’s all true.

Don’t expend all this energy into an emotional description. You risk getting into an unnecessary fight with him as he attempts to justify his actions or shrugs you off.

At worst, you could end up being the woman he jokes to his friends about as a warning.

Insult him.

Another thing you might want to do is get in the last word with a witty insult.

It might make you feel as if you have the upper hand momentarily. He might even feel stung or wounded by it.

But it won’t get you anywhere in the long run. It’s not a good look for you, and we know you’re better than that.

Beg him to come back.

If he seemed like a good match for you, you might start planning how to get him back.

You might start typing out a plea or message designed to change his mind. Maybe you’ve got the perfect, poetic thing written to express your budding feelings for him.

The problem is, this makes you look desperate. Even if you write a moving message worthy of an award, there’s a good chance he’ll continue to ignore you.

If he actually answered, he’ll likely think less of you. Worst of all, you’ll have shown him that he can walk all over you, and you’ll keep asking for him to come back every time.

That’s definitely not a stellar foundation to build a relationship on.

Further Reading: What to Text a Guy to Catch His Attention (Without Seeming Clingy)

Anything to try to make him jealous.

When we think of our exes, a common response is to wonder if they’d get jealous if they saw you happy now…even when you think you’re over them.

It can be the same for a guy who’s ghosted you. You may want to send him something showing him you’re better off or rub something in his face.

In short, it’s not worth your time. There’s no reason to text him things he doesn’t need to know.

If anything, leaving him alone has the greatest potential to get in his mind and make him wonder how you’re doing.

Text him more than once in a row.

So what happens when you message him once with one of our recommended texts, and he doesn’t answer? Should you send him another one?

The answer is a resounding no.

Sending more than one text in a row is fine with friends, family, or guys you’re in an established relationship with. But doing this to a guy who’s just started ghosting you is only going to push him even further away.

so What If He Gets Back in Contact?

Did he have a good reason for ghosting you? Then proceed as normal – with a little caution.

Sometimes life gets in the way. It’s entirely possible he had a valid cause for the radio silence, like a family or medical emergency that demanded his attention.

If he’s got a reason like this, we say text him as you did before the ghosting happened…but be on the lookout for him pulling future Houdini-style disappearing acts on you.

When you see a pattern happening like this time and time again, he’s probably messing with you. Show him the door to your life and let him go.

He just texted you out of the blue again with no explanation.

What if you’ve started to move on with your life and get over him, and he texts you again out of nowhere as if nothing happened?

Without any kind of explanation from him, it sounds like he might have gotten bored. At the very least, it’s pretty insensitive for him to randomly pick up the conversation as normal.

Decide whether or not you think he’s worth your time at this point. Our opinion, though, is that he’s likely not worth the effort.

This might be a good time, however, to explain that what he did was hurtful in a calm and reasonable tone. It’s possible you can get him to understand how it was wrong and not to do it again in the future.

Do you need a little guidance on how to interpret his texts? Amy North’s Text Chemistry Course is the perfect resource to help you decode his motives.

He’s not necessarily talking to you, but he’s liking your posts or pictures on social media.

If you’ve gotten to a point where he follows any of your social media accounts, you might run into him reacting to your pictures or posts.

This is a controlling and manipulative trend. When he can’t take the time to text you back, there’s no reason for him to try and steal some of your attention with this kind of tactic.

Our advice? It might just be better for you to unfriend him.

That will save you some heartache and give you the breathing room necessary to move on.

If You Need Help Putting Yourself Back Out There

Related Article: What to Text a Guy After He Cancels a Date (To Make Him Regret It)

When you’re ready to get back out there and find yourself a good guy, you might feel a little unconfident after the last one ghosted you.

That’s perfectly normal. If you need a confidence booster, we suggest trying out the Text Chemistry Course by relationship expert Amy North.

She’ll break down different texting techniques for you so you’ll always have something to fall back on when you’re not sure what else to say.