Being called dude by a guy you like may feel like a blow to the heart. Though he means it in a nice way, it’s not exactly a word that inspires a lot of romantic hope. So let’s examine this situation in more depth to see if you’re in the friend zone or if you still have a chance with your guy.
A Guy Called Me Dude – What Does it Mean?
So, your guy called you dude, huh? Yeah, that situation can feel rather strange and even frustrating. Few women enjoy being called dude and may even feel slightly insulted. There’s no need to panic, though. Your guy might still be into you, depending on a few different factors.
He Wants to Be Friends
Let’s just get this out of the way immediately: a guy may simply not be into dating you if he calls you dude. Of course, the term is one of endearment, and he probably likes spending time with you and thinks of you as a friend. But there may be a chance that he isn’t attracted to you or interested in dating anyone in general. So pay attention to how he uses this term to get a feel for this situation:
- “You know, you’re just like a dude, which makes you fun.”
- “Dude, you’re so fun and funny, I wish all girls were like you.”
- “Of all my dudes, I think that you might be my favorite by far.”
In this situation, it’s up to you to decide how you want to handle it. Do you give up on dating him and decide to hang out with other guys instead? Or do you accept his friendship and enjoy him as a person on a deeper level? We strongly suggest this approach: you can still get a lot out of a good guy friend in this way, even if his lack of dating interest is going to be frustrating and upsetting.
He Isn’t Good at Expressing Emotion
Let’s be as blunt as possible here: guys always aren’t good at expressing emotion. They know it, and we know it, and it can be very frustrating. In fact, some guys might want to tell you that they like you a lot but feel uncomfortable outside a friendship situation, calling you dude simply as a way to feel out the waters. So ask yourself the following questions to gauge what he might be thinking:
- Does he use the term the way other guys might use cute or sexy?
- Do you notice he likes to flirt with you in other ways, such as light touches?
- Is he obviously struggling to express emotions in any other situation?
When a guy struggles to express emotions, it is often up to the girl to make sense of the situation. That might not seem fair, but there’s not much that can be done about it. So instead, try to open him up with humor and honesty, talking about your interest in him and expressing any emotions that feel natural to you. In this way, you should avoid any problems and get the kind of in-depth experience that makes sense to you.
He Has a Limited Vocabulary
For some guys, dude is kind of a catch-all word, a term that they use with just about everybody. In other words, your guy may not have the most profound and most expressive vocabulary. We’re not saying he’s not intelligent, as plenty of smart people don’t have excellent verbal skills. However, he might be trying to tell you he likes you but isn’t sure what words to use. Here are a few things he might say if this is the case:
- “Dude, spending time with you makes me so happy.”
- “I can’t imagine any other, uh, dude, as smart as you.”
- “Dude, we need to hang out as soon as possible. I miss you.”
You may want to be a little risky and push things to the next level in this situation. For example, a light touch on the shoulder might draw him closer to you and open him up. Or you might want to go for it and kiss him or just let him know that you like him. You might be surprised at how many words he suddenly knows when he feels confident that you are into him.
Should You Say Something If He Calls You Dude?
There’s no need to get aggressively annoyed with your guy if he calls you dude. Yes, it’s not exactly something that you want to hear. But you might want to ask him what he means by it and clear the air a little bit. He may appreciate the chance to share what he feels in an open environment.
What If He Only Says Dude By Text?
Texting can feel like a more casual environment for some guys. As a result, he might use terms like dude or bro when he texts you. In this situation, it’s not as big of a red flag to be called dude. Pay attention to how he interacts with you in person to get a better feel for his emotions towards you as a person.
Can You Get Him to Stop Calling You Dude?
If you do start dating your guy and he keeps calling you dude, is it possible to get him to stop? That all depends: some guys use dude almost unconsciously and may struggle to quit. The dude addiction is real, and you need to be patient and understanding to ensure that he can create a better romance vocabulary for you two.
Make a Stand
While you don’t necessarily need to confront your guy if he calls you dude, it is essential to figure out exactly where you stand with him. It might feel uncomfortable at first or even cause some light friction, but you deserve an answer. Thankfully, he should be willing to give you one if he’s a good guy.