How to Text a Girl – The Complete Guide 2024

How to text a girl is super important in today’s dating scene. If you aren’t doing it well, you are unnecessarily screwing up a lot of potential interactions. Isn’t it hard enough?

Here you will learn the right way to text and see “how to text a girl examples” so you can copy and paste, and use them in your own interactions.

Table of Contents

How to Text a Girl

These are the guidelines to follow to learn how to text a girl.

1. Be confident.

2. Be masculine.

3. Be light-hearted and fun.

4. Lead the interaction.

5. Keep it positive.

6. Send flirty texts to keep out of the friend zone. 

7. Use good grammar.

8. Don’t reply immediately, wait at least 15 minutes. 

9. Match her response time as a general rule.

10. Text spontaneously, it’s more exciting.

11. Match her emoji usage as a general rule.

12. Tease and joke around when possible. 

13. Always move the interaction toward a date.

YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE: How To Flirt Over Text and In Person: Ultimate Guide 2023

How to Text a Girl for the First Time 

Here is a full text conversation I had with a girl I met at my local Starbucks. We were standing in line, she looked good, I said hi, and asked if she is from the area. We talked for about 3-5 minutes. 

I told her she seemed cool, we should get together some time for a drink. She said ok, we exchanged numbers, and said goodbye. I texted her 2 hours later. Always send your first text the same day.

Never reintroduce yourself in your first text. If you had a solid interaction, and you mentioned getting together, and she said “yes,” she should remember you by your first name.

How to text a girl example
How to text a girl example

How to Text a Girl – The Number Exchange

It all starts with your initial interaction. Exchange numbers with the intent of getting together. Mention something, like, “we should grab a drink sometime,” or “we should grab coffee sometime.” When she says ok she is telling you she wants to go out with you, at this point.

If you get a girl’s number without mentioning plans, there is a much lower chance you will ever meet up with her.

How To Text a Girl – Mindset

1. Your only job is to not screw things up. 

2. She likes you and wants to go out with you. 

3. She is hoping you say everything right so she can go out with you.

4. Present yourself well, she wants a high value, cool guy.

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How to Text a Girl You Like

In order to stay out of the friend zone, you must take chances and send some “very friendly” text messages on occasion. Your texting should clearly indicate your intent and interest.

If a girl is interested you will be able to tell from her response. This is a great way to move your relationship forward. If she is not interested, you’re better off knowing now and not wasting time. Here are a few examples:

  • Is it hot out, or is it just you 🥵
  • Roses are red, violets are blue, I have very special feelings for you.
  • Hi sexy thing 🌹
  • Even when we do nothing together I have a great time.

FULL LIST: 101 Flirty Texts For Her – Best Ones 2023

How to Text a Girl You Just Met

Send a very basic message. Sign it with your first name. You don’t have to reintroduce yourself. If she likes you she’ll remember you. Here are a few examples:

  • Random and cool to meet you
    -Matt 😉
  • Was nice talking to you.
  • Hi sexy girl from last night

How to Text a Girl You Haven’t Talked To in a Long Time

Assume familiarity and continue exactly where you left off. If she is interested, she will play along.

  • Thinking of your body while at work is quite distracting.
  • Is it normal that I get a tingler every time I think of you?
  • Heard you’ve been thinking about me all day.
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How to Text a Girl After Getting Her Number

Texting is not the place to get to know someone. The entire goal of text messaging is to get a girl out on a date and not screw things up. Every text you send has to move your interaction in that direction. ABC (Always be closing)! Here is the order to follow:

  • Send a “nice to meet you” text
  • Send a few texts back and forth
  • Casually mention plans, at a high point in the conversation.
  • If she is interested she will set plans, if not, try again in a week or so.

YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE: 101 Good Text Conversation Starters for Texting

How to Text a Girl – No-Nos

Your only job is to not screw things up when texting a girl.

1. Don’t send too many emojis.

2. Do not wait 3 days to text. 

3. Don’t vent or complain.

4. Do not sext. 

5. Don’t compliment more than once in a while.

6. Don’t always text first, don’t be predictable. 

7. Don’t double text, show restraint. 

8. Don’t be needy, annoying, or desperate. 

9. Don’t be so available.

10. Don’t blab too much, your goal is to get her on a date.

11. Don’t treat her like your girlfriend.

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Frequently Asked Questions

What Is the Best Way to Start a Text With a Girl?

  • Hi, how’s your day going?
  • Craziest dream ever, gotta tell you about it…
  • Saw something today, reminded me of you.

Is It Ok to Text a Girl First?

Yes, in fact, as a man, you should always text a girl first.  I recommend waiting an hour or two after you meet to send your first text. If you want to wait longer, just make sure to send the first text that same day.

What Is the 3 Day Rule?

The 3 day rule is a dating strategy that says you should wait three days to call someone after you meet. The theory is that waiting three days makes you look busier and of higher value, and therefore more desirable to the other person.  This strategy is no longer effective, nowadays you are long forgotten in 3 days.

More Info: American Psychological Association

How to text a girl


How to text a girl first, or at any time, is a skill set you can and must learn. Everything is laid out above. After a little bit of practice you will become an expert.

Matt Furman
Matt Furman

Hi, I’m Matt, the proud owner of Connection Copilot. I live in NYC and I’m passionate about all things dating. With a bachelor's degree in psychology, a professional coaching certification, and over 20 years of experience as a top tier dating coach, I've had the privilege of guiding and empowering thousands of individuals on their journey to meaningful connections.

I was born in New York and have never left. Having immersed myself in the fast-paced dating scene of New York City, learning as I go, I have gained much wisdom through experience. Consider me your trusted companion in your quest for love.