15 Reasons Guys Don’t Like to Text (And What To Do About It)

So, he has your number, but he’s not texting you… or, maybe you’ve been dating for a while but lately, he isn’t texting like usual. No worries, we’ve got you covered: read on below and discover 15 of the top reasons guys don’t like to text and what to do about it!

Why Don’t Guys Like to Text?

From simply being too busy with everyday life to overthinking what to say, there are a ton of reasons for guys not liking to text. 

Here are some of the most common ones:

1. They Are Playing Hard to Get

A lot of the time when a guy likes you, and you both know it, he’s just playing hard to get. He figures that the more time that passes in between the texts he sends, the more your heart will grow fond of him. Whether or not the tactic works out for him depends on your reaction. You could always flip the tables on him and do the same thing back to him in return… an eye for an eye and all that jazz.

2. They Don’t Have Time

Believe it or not, sometimes guys just don’t have time to text much (even when you’re a hot babe that they masturbate to in the shower every morning). Just because they aren’t texting doesn’t mean they aren’t waxing their weasels and envisioning you in their mind’s eye, because chances are that they are. Just as the chances are practically 100-percent positive that they’ll be texting you the minute they get some free time to do so.

3. They Want to Build Anticipation

Some genius guys hold off on texting because they want to build anticipation in the relationship or the possibility of one. The joke is on them most of the time, as other bolder guys (probably with larger scrotums at that) are bound to swoop in on any good-looking girl that’s single and ready to mingle. However, sometimes, this strategy pays off and Mr. Right gets his girl to bite, hook, line, and sinker.

4. They Are Busy With Life

Guys get busy with life from time to time, especially the ones who don’t live in their mom’s basement or the itty-bitty spare bedroom at their grandmother’s house. It’s not exactly that they don’t like texting, but they are genuinely not able to find the time amongst their busy workdays. Further, when they do get a minute, they may simply want to relax rather than send a crazy-sounding text and look like a big fat doofus.

5. It Takes Too Much Effort

Texting might be easy for many of us, but that isn’t the case for every single human being on the planet. Unfortunately, ladies, there are a bunch of guys out there who find texting just takes too much effort for them. You’ll know them when you read their texts, which will mainly consist of one-word replies with the occasional broken but full sentence or two.

6. They Don’t Know What To Say

When guys don’t know what to say, and they’re overthinking how she’ll react to the text, that’s all she wrote: its game over. Kiss your hopes for a text from him goodbye, because it’s just not going to happen. Unless you’re writing him a steady dialogue and encouraging him along (perhaps with pictures), you might as well break out the marshmallows and build a campfire because it’s going to be a long night waiting around for him to text you.

7. They Think Too Much

Speaking of guys that don’t know what to say, they often fall into the same group of guys who think too much. Both types of men genuinely dislike texting. It makes them feel anxious and perhaps a bit self-conscious about their weakness. Be careful not to press them about it too much, or they may start getting hot and cold with you or even end up ghosting you without warning.

8. They Don’t Know What Mood You’re In

Some guys couldn’t tell what mood you’re in through text messages if you spelled it out for them. These jokers don’t tend to enjoy texting much because they’re always anxious you’re going to take what they said the wrong way due to being in a different mood than they guessed you were. More or less, these guys wait around for you to text and then reply back. Expecting more is simply setting yourself up for failure.

9. They Forget About it

You wouldn’t believe it, but some guys actually forget to text. And, no, it’s not always the Cheech and Chong pineapple express smoking types either. Sometimes it’s the sweet and kind sort of guy too. Life just seems to have a way of sometimes making guys forget about everything except their friends, including their penises.

10. They Don’t Want to Be Tied Down

A lot of guys just don’t want to be tied down. They don’t want no stinkin’ long-term relationship and don’t need one either. They’d rather mess around for a bit, wait until things get less exciting, and find someone new to play around with. The good part is that eventually, these losers will walk themselves right out of your life with no effort needed from you. The bad part is for them; what goes around comes around and when they are ready to settle down you’ll be long gone.

11. They’d Rather Talk Face to Face

If you’re dating an older guy or one who was raised under a rock, they might not like texting because they’d rather talk to your pretty face with their face, not their fingers. In this case, the good thing is that you’ll get to see them more often. The bad part is they’ll probably never get any more comfortable or excited about texting you.

12. They’d Rather Talk On The Phone

There are also some guys that are only slightly technological hold-outs; they don’t mind talking to you on the phone, just not via texting. Whether they type slow, they believe texting is for the devil, or they never learned how to spell words in the first place, the world may never know. But, you’re sure to know when you’re dating one of these fellas because you’ll never receive a single text and they’ll keep your incoming call alarm vibrating on your phone all day long.

13. They’re Waiting For You To Text Them First

Some guys are absolute gentlemen in all things, including holding the door open for you, letting you have the first sip of coke from a shared soda, and even letting you text first. This sort of guy will rub your feet, massage your neck, and scoop your ice cream as well. But, what he will never do is summon up the courage to text you first. So, don’t even think otherwise!

14. They’re Scared

Similar to guys who let you text them first every time, some guys rarely text, or hate to text, because they are plain and simple just flat out scared to death. They don’t know what you’re thinking, what you’re doing, who you’re with, or if you even want them to text. These guys are often scared of their own shadows too, so don’t take it personally.

15. They Get Nervous

Guys get nervous just as often as women do, if not more. The larger the guy’s ego is, the more nervous he may get when he is in uncharted waters, or even just slightly out of his normal territory (conversation-wise). The best way to deal with these sorts of nervous texters is to lead them by the hand, in text. 

How to Handle When Men Don’t Like Texting

Some men simply dispise texting. Others don’t actually not like texting, it’s more the side-effects that tend to come along with that they’d rather avoid.

Here are a few tips for how to handle when men don’t like texting:

  • Text him first every day
  • Text him frequently enough to make him feel obligated to return a text
  • Ask him how he’s doing, and seem like you genuinely care
  • Ask him directly to the text you more, and use the puppy dog eyes
  • Explain to him why texting is important to you
  • Let him know that when he texts you it makes you feel special
  • Go through his phone and find out who he’s really spending his time texting


Why Do Men Not Like to Text?

Believe it or not, when asked why they don’t like to text, many men said that they don’t text because they’re afraid to open themselves up again after being hurt in a past relationship. Of course, there are far more reasons than this one. Others include general laziness, self-centric world views, and other excuses for guys with no shits to give about texting.

Why Do Guys Start Texting Less?

One of the primary reasons that guys start texting their partners less is because they just get busy with life and don’t have as much free time as usual. They can become busy with work, family, or even a side fling that they don’t want you to know about.

Why Doesn’t the Guy I Like Text Me?

If you know he likes you, and you’ve already given him your number, the chances are high that he is simply busy with things and hasn’t had the time to text you as much as he’d obviously like. If a guy is into you and has your number, he’s going to text sooner or later, especially if you text him first and encourage it. 

Jenny Muscolo
Jenny Muscolo

My name is Jenny and I love helping people with their relationships. I got my Masters in human sexuality at Northwestern University, and love what I do.

I believe a few simple tips can help you massively improve your communication skills with your partners, which leads to better interactions. Thanks for visiting!