Anyone who’s anyone has a social media account these days.
Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram have taken over our lives – for better or for worse. Just like with everything else now, these social media platforms play a big part in our relationships, too.
There’s a reason people say you’re “Facebook official” when you change your relationship status online. As the easiest way to express yourself and stay connected, you’ll document the ups and downs of your romance online where hundreds of friends and acquaintances can see.
Given that these platforms are so powerful, is it possible to get your ex back using them? In short: yes, you can use social media to help you get him back.
Want to know how? We’ll tell you all about how to get your ex-boyfriend back on social media.
Don’t Forget to Take Time for Yourself
Unfortunately, you can’t just jump right into getting your ex back. Come on too strong too soon, and you could drive him away for good.
Not to mention, you could end up breaking your heart even more.
What we and many love experts internationally recommend is implementing a no contact rule. That means that you choose to have no contact whatsoever with your ex for a period of time that you designate.
A good middle ground for your no contact period is about a month. During that time, you can focus on healing and bettering yourself so you come back more attractive than ever before.
If you think talking to your ex will be too much of a temptation during this time, you can unfollow or temporarily suspend your friendship with them on some platforms. Facebook, for example, has an option to let you take a break from one of your friends without completely unfriending or blocking them.
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Stay Away From These Social Media Blunders at all Costs
When it comes to winning your ex back over, staying away from deadly mistakes will be as important as the things you do right.
Here are the top social media blunders women make when they’re hoping to get their ex-boyfriend’s attention:
Airing your dirty laundry publicly.
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Our social media accounts offer us a ton of support. They are, after all, filled with friends, family, coworkers, and distant acquaintances who are part of your life.
It only makes sense that after an event that hurts you, like a breakup, you turn to social media for comfort. One way you might think of getting that comfort is by posting a lengthy status about the end of your relationship and how you were wronged.
You’ll want to do it to watch all of your loved ones rush to your side. Because of your pain, you will want to see an equal hurt inflicted on the person who hurt you – your ex-boyfriend.
We have one word for you: stop. What this will do is show him you’re a vindictive and bitter person who can’t let go of personal conflicts.
If there was a chance of you getting back together, you’ll thoroughly extinguish it.
Similarly, some women might want to post a status about how much they miss and love their ex-boyfriend still. Don’t do that, either.
In fact, don’t post any statuses about him at all. For the time being, what happened is between you two – not you and 400 other people.
Trying to make him jealous by posting about your dates.
You see about it everywhere: women all over the world hoping to get their ex chasing them by making him think she’s desired by someone else.
To be honest with you, yes, jealousy is a powerful tool. Use it well, and you’ll have your ex going insane with the need to claim you for himself once more.
But you don’t need to do toxic things to make him jealous. You don’t need to post statuses and pictures about all the other men you’re dating now in the hopes that he’ll see it.
You know why? Because even if he does see these posts and gets a little bit jealous, he may just choose to unfollow you.
Worse yet, he may block you entirely. If that happens, you can just about kiss your chances of getting back together good-bye.
That’s not to say you shouldn’t go on dates and live your life in the meantime. You absolutely should (although you might not want to get too serious with anyone else if you’re still into your ex!).
Just keep his feelings in mind. You wouldn’t like him posting about other women, so keep the details of your love life to yourself for the time being.
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Creeping through his profile ALL. THE. TIME.
You over there refreshing your social media every few minutes to see if your ex-boyfriend posted something new – we see you.
And we have a question for you: what are you hoping to get from creeping through his profile?
Be honest with yourself here, and you’ll realize you don’t stand to gain anything from this destructive practice. You’re probably just doing it so you can be aware the very second he shows an interest in another woman or looks like he’s moving on.
Continuing to dig through his profile is masochistic. You will only hurt yourself.
Step back from his profile. If you can’t keep yourself from stalking him, think about maybe taking a short break from social media until you’ve regained some composure.
Sharing too much.
Even if you’re not digging through your ex’s profile, you might harbor this tiny, tiny hope that he’s keeping an eye on yours.
So you start posting more and more. Pictures, statuses, checking into different locations – you lay out everything in your feed for everyone to see.
As long as you think it looks good and as long as you feel it makes you look happy, it gets posted. Anything to seem like you’ve moved on.
We’d be willing to bet you’ve had least one friend in the past who posted way too much, flooding your newsfeed with unimportant posts every day. We’re also willing to bet that, if they didn’t stop real fast, you ended up unfollowing them.
Annoy your ex with too many frequent posts, and he’ll just do the same thing to you.
Yes, he’ll see some of your posts, and a few of them may even get to him. But if you’re not aware of how men think, you won’t be able to get through to his heart again.
We know it can be confusing. That’s why we rely on proven strategies like those in the Devotion System.
It’s full of tricks so powerful, your ex-boyfriend will find himself wanting to pledge himself to you and only you after you use them.
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Let’s make one thing clear first: we believe it’s perfectly okay (sometimes even necessary) to block your ex. If you need to protect yourself from his toxicity or you find you absolutely can’t move on when you want to, blocking him is a wise step to take.
However, this step doesn’t really make sense so much if your goal is to call him yours again. How are you supposed to use social media to get back in his good graces if he has no way to reach out to you?
Again, if you’re really feeling like you can’t stand seeing his posts on your feed right now, consider temporarily unfollowing him or taking a break. Then, when you’re ready to try and get him back for real, you won’t need to go through the awkward process of adding him again.
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How to Get your Ex-Boyfriend Back on Social Media: What Works
Now that you know what to stay away from, you might be wondering: what actually works, then?
Well, we’re glad you asked. Here’s what you can do on social media to get your ex-boyfriend craving you again:
Take a break from posting for awhile.
You’re probably confused by this one. If you’re going to use your social media to win him over, why should you take a break from it?
Believe it or not, this strategy has a ton of advantages. To start with, it keeps you from making any of the mistakes we mentioned previously, like bashing your ex or stalking his profile.
It also gets him curious. He’ll think about where you are and what you’re doing naturally…and without your posts to give him that information, he’ll start to go wild with the curiosity.
He might even just text you to figure out what you’re up to.
Then put your wellness on display.
If you’re back at the social media grind, use it to show off how well you’re doing…just not excessively, otherwise you risk oversharing.
Post a status here and there when you have plans. Show everyone that you’re making a recovery after the breakup, and you’re looking forward to the future.
You could even post a picture occasionally of yourself looking happy.
What this does is demonstrate to your ex that you don’t need him. Even if you’re absolutely lovesick over him still, he’ll see you as a strong, confident, and bright person.
He’ll be drawn to your light like a magnet. He’ll start thinking about how he misses you and why you’re not missing him.
Make sure your posts sound bright and positive.
No matter what you’re posting, your tone should be positive. You might be feeling absolutely terrible, but don’t let your ex see that you’re miserable.
Frame your life in a light manner. Again, the goal here is to show everyone (including your ex) that you’re getting better, and that you’re living life to the fullest.
Say all you did was post negative statuses about how you’re depressed and you can’t stop missing him. Then what he’ll see is someone who can’t get over him.
When it comes to romance, it’s better to be needed than to need. Needing someone more than they need you gives them the power to take advantage of you, or makes you seem undesirable and desperate.
If you can’t think of anything positive to post, then follow the old adage: if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. You can take some more time to heal and continue posting on your accounts when you feel better.
Show him that he’s still on your mind.
Now, this strategy is something you won’t do right away. You’ll need to wait until after your no contact period (if you did one), or until a little time has passed.
If you started doing this right away, he would think you’re obsessed with him. Needless to say, that would turn him off faster than anything else.
Anyway, what you’ll do is tell him you’re thinking of him…indirectly. Instead of posting a status or DMing him that he’s on your mind, start tagging him in things.
See a meme that you think he’d laugh at? Tag him in it.
Did someone post a video that you know he’d be interested in? You guessed it: tag him.
Don’t go overboard with the tagging, though. Ideally, you shouldn’t be tagging him in things more than once every day or two.
Trust us, a little goes a long way here. He’ll know that you’re still thinking of him and that you care about things he enjoys.
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Start up on a conversation once you’re feeling more comfortable.
You can either wait until you’re feeling up to it, or you can take his cues if he’s showing interest in you. This would be if he’s tagging you in things, posting things on your wall, or commenting on your statuses.
Once you’re ready, reach out to him by DM. What you say here is up to you.
You can check on how he’s doing, send him a joke, or reminisce with him about your relationship. If you need some inspiration, you can modify some of the texts from our article on what to text your boyfriend after a no contact period for a message on a social media platform.
If he responds to you with more than a frigid one-word answer, then you’re golden. He’s clearly interested enough to talk to you.
Keep the conversation lighthearted and easy in the beginning. Your goal should be to use your social media account to get him to meet with you again.
You shouldn’t try to start the relationship again solely through social media. Rather, it’s a tool you can use to arrange that first meeting so you can discuss your feelings face-to-face.
Watch his tone and how he talks to you. When he seems friendly and responsive, consider asking him to meet you for lunch or coffee sometime soon.
When you’re actually hanging out, you’ll be able to have an earnest conversation about getting back together. He’ll be able to hear and see how sincere you are, instead of those feelings getting lost in text.
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Get Him Hopelessly Devoted to You All Over Again
Put simply, social media is just a tool you can use to regain your ex-boyfriend’s heart. However, like with all tools, it’s pretty much useless if you don’t know how to use it.
Understanding the psychology of men’s minds will give you information you’ll need to ensure your ex-boyfriend becomes hopelessly devoted to you.
Fortunately, there’s a program written to give you an inside peek at how men think and feel. It’s aptly named the Devotion System, and it was designed by romance coach Amy North to help you get any bound to you forever.
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